Thursday, February 22, 2007

PT: The Body


flattens me

gin in the veins
might help

tonight I fly on brittle bones
out of this skin

this old pain

my top and bottom

sleep waivers like mirages
in a white fossil sea of aspirin

that dulls the saw
between deeper jacknifed vertebrae

this great grey sleep of bone
sucks me dry

(painting, Salvatore Dali: My Wife, Nude, Contemplating Her Own Flesh Becoming Stairs,
Three Vertebrae of a Column, Sky and Architecture, 1945)



desert rat said...

Indeed, we did write about the same thing; only yours is so much better than mine!
"sleep waivers like mirages
in a white fossil sea of aspirin"
is just perfect.
You have succeeded where I floundered.

DewyKnickers said...

I am sorry that you hurt. :(

I like the poem and how the pain makes strange visions happen.

Hope you feel better.



Brian said...

I like the "gin" line. I understand the pain in your poem.


Poet with a Day Job said...

I love this poem - and I am completely IN TUNE WITH THE BACHACHE OF IT! As someone who suffers this afflication, I just want to say: you hit the nail on the head. I love how the accompanying picture made me think you were going to write something else - then you wrote "Bachache" and I instantly got it: it was the spot on the nude's back my eyes were drawn to first, that damn low back of persecution! So well done.

paris parfait said...

Such a powerful poem about pain! I know what back pain is like and your poem nails it! Hope you feel better soon!

gautami tripathy said...

Love this Dali painting. I am a great fan of his.

I like the verse too!

turquoise cro said...

Ouch! Whazzzzuuupppp with this? My back has been giving me fits today! I've had my back going out(without me! lol) usually at least one bad spell per year but haven't had that for at least 2 years and today it scares me once again! HOPE yours comes around soon! xo,Cinda

Tammy said...

Fantastic poem! I felt my back ache reading it and my back's fine. I'm sorry you are feeling this horrible pain :(

PS I love the painting

chiefbiscuit said...

I just love this poem. It describes the separation of mind from body and its pain expertly - and the mind-altering substances are cleverly drawn in. A fine poem about pain and the way the mind plays with the body during a pain-riddled sleep enhanced (skewed?) by aspirin-riddled hallucinations.

Remiman said...

The palpability and the simultaneous untouchability of pain. it changes all the world around us. You've described the vision well.

Maryellen said...

Sorry to hear you too live in pain. Wish I could take aspirin, but the best I can do is Tylenol to take an edge off. The painting is gorgeous and S. Dali is one of my all time favorites.

I hope your pain is not chronic but passing.

Pam said...

Your poem of pain touches the heart.

jim said...

Stunning poem, with all the dessicated, white, bone-dry imagery, and the lining that suggests the separate vertebrae, the fracturing and slipping. Wow.

wendy said...

EVERY sing line is my favorite. The flying on brittle bones...sings a solo though.


pepektheassassin said...

Thanks, everybody! (It's not as bad as it sounds....)

pepektheassassin said...

LOL--chief, that's me: ASPIRIN-riddled! (I'm always on the street, looking for MORE!)

rat, sea--flounder--your comment sounds very "fishy" to me! In fact, your poem was successful.

dewy, thank you.

brian, I needed that. Back at ya!

poet, what spot? Oh, THAT lower back spot! I was looking for a mole or something!

everyone, thanks for your kind comments and your concern: makes me feel better already!

pepektheassassin said...

Poet! THere really IS a spot there! (enlarge the picture by clicking!)

Poet with a Day Job said...

Yes indeed! A mole AND a "dark epitome"

Good one!

Norma said...

I know this poem well. Runs in my family. Wonderful.

Crafty Green Poet said...

I can feel ths pain in this poem, I love the lines:

'sleep waivers like mirages
in a white fossil sea of aspirin'

Hope you feel better soon.

jillypoet said...

Wow! You have some fine words here! Man! Every word is strong, strong, strong. The flow, the rhythm, the sound. Awesome. I like how you've set it up, too.

flattens me

The word backache actually flattens "me." Cool. "tonight I fly on brittle bones" flies right on into "out of this skin." Also cool.

I really like this poem.

Dana said...

I would never know where to start in writing about physical pain. I just wouldn't. I would overwrite or say things that are obvious. But you've approached this so well, so wonderfully.

AscenderRisesAbove said...

salvador was a funny guy wasn't he? i could identify with the ache in the spine